DBT Starter Kit & Resource Guide
- Alicia Paz
- 16 hours ago
- 5 min read
Are you starting your DBT journey and wondering where to start with so much information out there? Are you overwhelmed with book options, self-help websites, and blogs? This is the DBT 101 Starter Kit.
As a DBT Therapist I get a lot of questions from people who are overwhelmed or don't know where to begin. Every person will find different parts of DBT that work for them (or don't work,) so be gentle with yourself in taking any advice - including my own. Also if you are in traditional in-person group DBT, I would reach out to your provider's staff regarding books and other resources specific to their program.
1. Ask yourself: how much time do I have to dedicate to this right now?
Begin by thinking about how much time can you reasonably spend daily or weekly learning DBT. The purpose or learning DBT is to utilize the skills not just memorize names of skills. Do you want to sit down for an hour a week and learn? Ten minutes of quiet time a night? Both are great ways to start. Knowing which fits best into your life will help make the best use of your time.
2. Get a book!
There are many texts out there. I actually have a video exploring a bunch. The book pictured below is hands down my favorite. It's easy to use and understand and contains worksheets for its 125 skills. If the price is too steep, try your local library!
There are some great more specific books out there by the same company (New Harbinger) that are specific to certain diagnoses that also have great value. If you strongly identify with a diagnosis, those books might be a great start. There are books for Bipolar, Anxiety, PTSD and Anger among others. They are all different colors, but from the same publishers and they look nearly identical.
DBTSelfHelp.com (which I now also own and is a great free resource for learning DBT skills) has a big list of DBT books and workbooks of various types on their Bookshop.org affiliate storefront - that means that if you purchase a book from those links, your money goes to supporting the upkeep of that website.
3. Practice Mindfulness
I think to think of DBT being a large book with 4 chapters, called modules, Mindfulness is one of them. As much as diving right into interpersonal skills sounds great, mindfulness maybe a better starting point or an overlap in learning along with another module. Practicing a few minutes of mindfulness daily can help start to build that muscle. To help you get started, these are my favorite mindfulness apps and books:
Apps: Phone apps are handy especially for on the go. Calm and Headspace are perhaps the most famous but typically require subscriptions (check if your workplace or health insurance offers a free subscription though!). Insight Timer is a great free option - it has a paid version too but SO much is available for free.
YouTube: Personally, I like starting by listening to calming music and focusing on my breath for a few minutes. I like gentle music or sounds of rain like this, there are plenty of guided meditations on YouTube, I prefer the shorter ones like this, but there are videos of practically every length. You can search for a specific type like Square Breathing or Body Scan.
Books: I enjoy reading about mindfulness. There are now a ton of books including some for young children. DBTSelfHelp.com has a list of books on mindfulness on their Bookshop.org affiliate storefront as well.
Podcasts: Podcasts are great and popular and there are a lot; some discuss mindfulness and DBT and some go skill-by-skill explaining them all. Even if they're not currently updating, these are still great resources.
Bay Area DBT: Great podcast that goes in-depth about skills
DBT & Me: A fantastic podcast from two DBT therapists that go into depth about skills.
4. Create a plan
So now you have a new book to read, some time dedicated to it set aside, and next you need a plan. The following is the schedule for traditional in-person DBT (90-120 minutes) and it works well, but I also think there can be lots of variety when doing this on your own.
Schedule for 45-60 minutes weekly:
10-15 minutes mindfulness
Week review (go over diary cards)
Learn 1-2 new skills
Review skills, how and when to use them
20-minutes twice weekly:
5 minutes mindfulness
Learn 1 new skill a week; on Monday learn the skill, on Thursday check in regarding use of the same skill and how and when to use it
5. Get a journal
DBT is about using skills, not just memorizing them. It's also purposefully repetitive and has so many worksheets! It is useful to get a journal, or have some organized space to file some of this away and yet keep it close by when you need it. Some students find it helpful to journal their experiences, struggles, and successes. There are even DBT-specific journals available. I review a bunch of them here.
6. Be gentle on yourself
This is so new to you and doing it on your own, even with some support, isn't always easy. Take it slow, don't overwhelm yourself with doing too much too fast, and give yourself some space to do non-DBT things too.
7. Don't make DBT your only resource
DBT is great. I have been teaching it for many years. I continue to encourage students to see their therapist, take their meds as prescribed, and add DBT to their mental health plan. But DBT isn't the only thing that works. DBT coping skills can change lives, and so does medication, talk therapy, yoga, meeting up with supportive friends and taking your dog on a walk among many other things.
8. Still need help? (It's ok!)
Tried these tips and still staring at your book or writing in your journal that you are feeling lost?
In person DBT: If you can make it to an in person DBT class, it may help you learn DBT, meet people in a similar struggle and get structure in your learning. Nifty map of some providers here.
Online DBT: I have a self-paced video course, with all the DBT skills included, that you can purchase if you prefer video learning. Some places offer online DBT groups, too!
9. Give yourself credit and patience
This isn't an easy task and DBT is a "meaty" thing to learn on your own. Recovery isn't a linear path and that is okay.
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